Monday, January 16, 2017


My Red Dawn fantasy always had me camping out in the Alpental Valley. We'd have the box canyon to ourselves, probably have a sick compound where we'd build some snake runs. Jumps. Winter Spring Summer Fall: that's the spot. We'd have sentries up on the ridges, monitoring I-90 for Chinese troop movements, ready to pin em in, maybe blast rocks down on them if they tried to barge. It wouldn't be too bad. Never figured out the food situation, or who'd be the eye doctor, but comeonsrsly this is a childhood fantasy, not real life!

Turns out it's not the Chinese. It's the Russians. And Donald Trump. Yeah, that same guy--Donald Trump! And xenophobic sexist racist asshole dummies. Surreal.

And a few hundred yards away from Lot 4 is not even remotely remote enough to create and sustain New Alexandria.* And there's too much dogshit. Way too much. And some clueless noob would leave their GPS on--or actually, just livestream trying to find a place to sled^--and blow the spot before Ivan'n'dem even finished the barbed wire fence around the Issaquah internment camp.

But that's where I've been. Me and my buddies. On our snowboards. On our splitboards. Can't do nothing but.


*of course I'm in charge.

^srslybro: there's the blind downswinger corner, and the very end of the grooming, under Trash Can. And 30 foot closeout drop-ins off the snow wall, over a car reef. You drove past so many other superior sledding zones! What are you doing?

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